10. She had banned so many books the Wasilla library was running out of books.
09. A 400+ page book sounded like the right size to hit Levi on the head.
08. Writing a book is the only way she could get on Oprah
07. The book advance was her personal bailout package and a stimulus rolled into one, and it was not from the Federal Govt.
06. She thought she could be the first to tap into the Russian market given that she could see the bookstores from her porch.
05. She wanted readers to get a feel for what its like to be before a death panel.
04. Doggone it, she wanted to be the first Joe Six Pack to write a book for all Joe Six packs.
03. Writing a book was so fast and easy she wouldn’t have to quit mid-way.
02. She was “Pallin’ around with publishers”
01. She didn’t cut it as a pitbull with lipstick, so she settled for a book that was all “bull” instead.

Someone sent this to me. The creative mind behind this is unfortunately not known. But it’s hilarious nevertheless!

10. You are panting for breath in the ICU but going “Hoo Naan, Hoo Naan”

09. You remember being Client #9 (oops, table #9) but are wondering how you became victim #1.

08. While in the ICU you recall seeing your grandma who died 25 years back pacing up and down your ancestral home but instead of the customary chant of “Rama, Rama” you hear her saying “Mapo Tofu”.

07. You are bewildered to read a front page report in the NY Times where the Bush Govt. accuses the Al-Qaida for food poisoning cases in the Chinese restaurants in the US.

06. Your 55-year old sweet Filipino nurse in the hospital keeps telling you “Sir, your Mapo Tofu breakfast is ready. You can have Mongolian chicken for lunch!”

05. The dreaded 3 am phone call comes not to the white house but to your house and your spouse has to answer, there is no right or wrong answer and Dr. at the other end simply says “We are not sure we can!”.

04. You see these strange visions of John McCain dancing around a fire with Ronald Reagan gesturing to you and saying “My friend, come join the Reagan Revolution we can kick some Chinese ass but you ain’t getting universal healthcare”

03. You are watching the Obama girl but she is singing in Chinese!

02. You see Shahrukh Khan dancing around on a cricket pitch filled with rupee notes and signs for the IPL but strangely enough he suddenly stops and says in his characteristic style, “Chi–Chi-Chi-neeeese food ka-ka-kaaa jawaab nahin!”

01. You are convinced that Tom Friedman’s flat world actually means you could go to any part of the world eat Chinese food and find yourself flat on your back in the Emergency Room (ER) fighting for your life.

Rahul Dravid quietly bailed out from the hot seat of India captaincy. Here are the Top 10 reasons why Dravid quit:

1. He was always late for practice thanks to Bangalore traffic.
2. He wanted to fire Ganguly, but Greg was no longer around to “execute”.
3. Pawar mailbox was always full so he could never send him email.
4. Kapil paaji @ICL offered him a deal that he could not refuse.
5. He had planned to take off his T-shirt (a la Dada) after the ODI at Lords but it didn’t materialize.
6. 20-2o commentary seems more fun.
7. He wanted to end nightmares he was having about the upcoming tour of Australia.
8. He misinterpreted Chak de and Chucked his captaincy!
9. US Intelligence believes it is because of Al-Qaida.
10. He couldn’t bear the frequent calls from Azhar-bhai.

10. Darn it, what’s with the weather, its f…. cold these days!
09. Hey, what’s the lady doin’ behind me?
08. You might not like my Iraq policy, but don’t tell me you like Hillary!
07. I hereby announce that Jeb has just formed a Presidential exploratory committee.
06. Jenna wants a book contract, Anybody?
05. Born in Hawaii to a Kenyan father and a Caucasian woman from Kansas, a man who has dedicated his life for American working families, please join me in recognizing, on my far left, America’s first black President, Barack Obama.
04. I have a new Iraq policy. It is called, “No troops left behind”. I am sending all our troops to Iraq.
03. Sorry folks, you are not the first ones to hear my speech. A short while back, one of my body guards uploaded a camera phone recording of my speech on Youtube.
02. My fellow Americans, I screwed up in Iraq. Big time. Yes, BIG BIG time.
01. Goodnight & Good Luck, God bless my Iraq policy.

10. There is no staff available due to the holiday season after tonite to perform the execution.
09. He threatened to release his personal Iraq Study Group report while the Bush administration has barely flipped through the original ISG report.
08. Yahoo released Saddam’s IM sessions with Hugo Chavez to US Intelligence.
07. After the Tara Cotter pardon, the US was fearful of Trump pardoning Saddam.
06. Saddam just rented Al Gore’s “Inconvenient Truth”
05. Google would have done it, but their execution products are not due until 2008.
04. Cheney was threatening to go hunting in Iraq.
03. Youtube traffic has dropped dramatically and they need some new videos.
02. His execution is discussed in the first para of Bush’s speech to the nation next week.
01. Saddam just registered on Second Life!

Check out this report about Keith Richards quitting drugs because they aren’t good anymore!!

10. The Whitehouse computer network was down and Indian engineers are held up without visas, so he had no choice but to go himself.
09. His administration had outsourced phone taping and he wanted to personally listen in on what was going on in the Whitehouse in his absence.
08. Just checking before entrusting the Indians with American ports.
07. Competition from India? “Sure, lemme tak’m on first”
06. He thought the best way for him to feel the loss of American jobs was to meet those having them.
05. He had heard that India had something better than the Taj Mahal in Atlantic City.
04. After the Katrina fiasco he wanted to personally interview future FEMA staff.
03. With his term coming to an end in a couple of years he was just headed where the jobs are!
02. With his approval rating at 34% it was time to “cut and run”
01. It was a pre-emptive move after he saw Cheney wiping his gun.

10. This was meant to be a warning for Iranian President Mr. Ahmadinejad!
9. He was preparing for a long battle over Iraq.
8. He saw Mr. Whittington watching Bin Laden’s video on his Ipod and thought he had his man.
7. He was sick of hearing Mr. Whittington complain about escalating medicare costs.
6. He was convinced by intelligence reports that Mr. Whittington was actually a duck.
5. He was under the influence of a lame duck President.
4. He was so frustrated after hunting for 8 hours with no success.
3. He had always dreamed of giving the US troops in Iraq a demo.
2. Now that Alito was on the Supreme Court he felt he could do whatever he wanted.
1. He was sure Mr. Whittington was carrying WMDs.